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Thoughts In A Loop

by Jesse Judies

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1.
Chemistry 03:33
Warm July, I’m not going home to sleep Got a gang here of twenty lives Beating drum heads inside of me Fall in and out of time Waging war when we need release Upping our dosage of petty crimes Running naked through the streets If we have to crawl we’ll get somewhere If we have to crawl we’ll get somewhere You wanna fly but you never want to die Long Goodbye, smashing pumpkins before we leave Wrestle with jackie another time, over her shoulder into the leaves Whetting our appetites, burning candles and summoning Light as a feather you’re turning white Heart is racing what’s happening
2.
Gonna wake up early in the morning Ask my guide where we’re going? Feel like walking on the moon? Through the mist, groundsels bloom Funny but the second time amazed me Shed my skin, like you raised me Can you hear the mother sing? Bending notes, Evergreen (still unseen) And we are on our own Into unknowns This is gonna happen When’s it gonna happen? There’s no right, there’s no wrong We’re overreacting Lying there circling a feeling Just give in, start believing If there’s water on the moon Everything you said was true Are we on our own? I’ll never know This is gonna happen When’s it gonna happen? It feels right, till it’s wrong We’re overreacting!
3.
Out There 03:13
Maybe one day when I wake from a slumber you and I will meet Shiny new skin in a silversun number Rational and clean Somewhere out there out where I don’t care, I don’t care Maybe one day when we’re way way younger you and I will think Remember those days when our future selves wandered nostalgic for our dreams Somewhere out there out where Somewhere out there out where etc. I don’t care Maybe one day when we’re way way older You and I will meet shed some pain will you wear my shoulders shorten up my sleeves
4.
Symmetry 03:42
Wanting two of everything my self destructive symmetry divides Caught between opposing needs our hemispheres, energies align, so alive My head is filled with bitter green, my tongue it senses dopamine arrive Skin and muscle listening for twitches, electricity, am I more than just a sum of all these ancient functions Walking fabrication, immortal fascination Trying to assess my fate, where strange behaviors originate but I Got lost among a sea of words, can’t pronounce these latin terms Am I more than just a sum of all these ancient functions Walking fabrication, immortal fascination
5.
6.
See your picture and start clinging Reliving memories in and out of sequins Aside from sending kind regards on a postcard so much was unspoken Give me something stronger And harder than you have to me A body that lasts longer than summers And soft memories No bottom to A body that lasts longer No bottom to this hunger See your footprints needles stinging You speak a language, motivated creepin Behind your smile, so beguiled Id forgotten Your methods are so tragic I need something stronger and harder Than you gave to me A feeling that lasts longer than summers Soft memories No bottom to this hunger Give me something stronger A body that lasts longer No bottom to this hunger Give me something stronger A feeling that lasts longer No bottom to this hunger
7.
I wanna live my life cachin feelin You and I lay in bed, high on the weekend We can begin again Wanna live my life make believin You and I can survive another weekend We can begin again I made my mistakes, judging by my wagers I Might look good in person, not so good on paper A list of side effects connected to my nature The Pleasure principle is guiding my behavior A Semi naked ape, my fate’s unorthodox I Skipped the rituals Saved my quarters for slots Tattoos on your flesh Let me guess You’re one of us Pump the oxygen, dim the lights, take it off Wanna Live my life catching feelin You and I lie in bed high on the weekend Wanna live my life catchin feelin You and I live and die, where’s the meaning? Descended from a caveman I’m still learning to walk Upright citizen, documenting my thoughts From Kihei to Paiia I can’t carry that cross Unless the replica’s convincing, in that case we should talk I made a mistake somewhere in this equation Intermittent love for genetic variation A list of benefits, pages thick Are you salvation Or, are you just the beginning of my stagnation? I wanna spend my life catchin feeling You and I live and die, there’s the meaning
8.
Feel life coming back, Back from the dead, couldn’t hold my own Not gonna react until I’m known Daylight skins attract Biting my nails cause I like them shorn No eye contact until I’m home Give your life to me the sum of your parts and waking dreams Unchained, unbroke, unglued Feeling this again is deja vu Give your life to me Speaking in tongues, unwavering Unmake, unearth, undo Feeling this again is deja vu We know, we kno all of this fades Bridges and walls, none of it stays Nighttime hollers back Hand on your neck, wolves are howling now They’re here to protect us from Ourselves Streetlights fading quick, blood on your lips we are counting down Untie my wrists? Love we are bound
9.
Silvestre 04:47
Verse 1: Just when i begin to live a life The Consequence of skin A wilderness I dreamt about I find your eyes yeah just passing phrase What kept our worlds apart is in our hands No distance that can harm us don’t even think about it Shine, your light Chorus: We should be together if You’d surrender Caught up in our wants till things fall apart (time) Cause things fall apart We could be together if remember If you remember time tears things apart (time) Time tears things apart apart Time tears things apart Verse 2: The fallacy began when I arrived The wantonness I have ( I had) A wilderness within, without Alive, alive yeah I wanna be the one one choose you can Burn it all down, do whatcha gotta do From the capital to the avenues There’s a billion lies between me and you Time tears things a part <-just passing phrase Chorus 2: We should be together if You’d surrender Caught up in our wants till things fall apart Cause things fall apart Time tears things apart
10.
Pearl 03:53
Pearl’s got blue eyes and jet black (pack) hair She’s got my heart on a permanent scare I Just found out she’s leaving town I thought that I was Keeping her around I Called her up to give her a hand Out comes the truth found another rich man He lives up north, east of the Sound I Thought that i was keeping her around-repeat It just ain’t fair This just ain’t fair How can this be? You’ll take my heart from me How can I get you to stay You’ll be two states away A million miles from me I’ll see you in my dreams Pearl shades her eyes Her Skin stays fair Cranes dot the sky In every photos she shares Now she’s up north, Emeralds abound I thought he was keeping you around It just ain’t fair This just ain’t fair How can this be? You’ll take my heart from me How can I get you to stay You’ll be two states away A million miles from me I’ll see you in my dreams Pearl’s got blue eyes and jet black hair She scarred my heart with a permanent tear
11.
I’ll never waste your time again Never wake up in your bed You don’t respond to anything I send But, if you need me I would talk you off your ledge 6 months go by Still no call I think it’s safe to say you’re un available Do you remember anything you said? If you need me I could talk you off your ledge If you need me I could walk you off your ledge Have we lost Our Connection Can’t form a sentence Vowel sounds like prisoners building up the nerve to end it Is it you, or me? Pull the trigger, targets flee Your path Like an avalanche I can’t predict the ending Look down your light is on I sent you my favorite song Reread your favorite poems Oh, I… In my heart I’m feeling that your words have double meaning Double meaning! Have we lost Our Connection Can’t form a sentence Vowel sounds like prisoners building up the nerve to end it Is it you, or me? Pull the trigger, targets flee Your path Like an avalanche I can’t predict the ending
12.
Funny Girl 04:11
Bri, you’re such a funny girl Suspicious of our happening Waiting for my shoe to drop Find out what’s wrong with me Me, I’m good at keeping my guard Disguising insecurities Thoughts in a loop, When I can’t regroup It’s like there’s two of me Bri, you’re such a funny girl Compulsive, weighing everything How far you have come, how much left to run Your formulas are perfunctory Me, I’m good at speaking my mind Obsessive, and meandering Marathon stories, another left turn morning In perpetuity Is it out of my hands, all in my heart Beginning to end, what’s the shape of this arc
13.
Over It 03:15
Through self hypnosis I’m having more fun Starting at ten when I’m down to the one And by the time you land, unpack your bags Change your address, bathe your cat I’ll be signing autographs won’t be wondering where you’re at So Give up, I give up Over it, over it, I’m over it Found out you’ve taken New liberties No more apartments, carpet crawling with fleas Moving on upward to the east side Hella romantic Should I wait for an invite So Give up, I give up Over it, over it, I’m over it Ignore it, go forward Count down from 10 to 1 Ignore it go forward Give Up, give up, give up Over it

credits

released May 1, 2020

Vox, Guitar, Synth, Bass, Sampler, Keyboards, Production: Nick Bray
Additional Vox: Katrina Bushnell
Drums: Colin Crosskill
Engineer/Producer: Tone
Additional vocals, production and engineering: CDCM

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Jesse Judies San Francisco, California

Jesse Judies is the collaborative project of Bay Area based indie singer-songwriter Nick Bray and Katrina Bushnell.
Bray, a previous member of Music For Animals, Nova Albion and current front man of EagleWolfSnake, decided to write, record, and produce his first album in 2018. The result has nods to Beck, Beastie Boys, The Whitest Boy Alive, LCD Soundsystem and Steve Miller Band.
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